Masters of Mayhem

First off, this is the 5th time I've written this post. This is quite annoying, Tom. So, I am putting in a feature request so you can input the blogs via a file upload so that you can write it offline then upload the entire blog later.

With that said...

Since I've had my iPod, I've been diligently converting all my precious CDs to AACs. I spent a lot of time this week also downloading art for each of these records and associating them properly. In order for me to do that, I had to delete everything from my iPod then put everything back. When I got to the Smashing Pumpkins catalog, which is the biggest component of my collection with official albums, live tracks, and bootlegs, I reminisced about driving around the streets of San Antonio in my '86 Mustang LX bumping the Pumpkins at massive volumes and thinking to myself, "Nothing is ever gonna top this loudness!"

Well, I was wrong...

In recent years audio mastering has been more about volume and excess than taking music into consideration. This belief is fueled on the idea that the louder the record, the more of a chance it'll get played on the radio. That might've been true in the old days of vnyil and tape, but little do people know that radio stations take any recording, add 10-20 Db of gain to the recording to make it louder then limit the hell out of the signal to get the recording to smooth out prior to being broadcasted. So, if you're recording is already a few DB less than the standard rock record, once it gets played on the radio, it sounds just like everything else.


For those of us not on the radio, we have to think about it. People have become accustomed to hearing records with hardly any dynamic range on them and think something is wrong if they hear a record with normal dynamics. Also, there is a level of "crunch" that can be introduced into a mix with judicious use of a mastering program that is magical when pushed very hard. However, artists with loud/soft song dynamics in their records miss out on that advantage when even the soft parts are at 10 (the loud parts go up to 11).

I wonder if the Pumpkins took these ideas into consideration when they made their records or if they just took advantage of what could be done and got them to the loudness that they could for the times. For now, I have selected to bump up all the recordings in volume just so I don't have to reach for the volume button when a SP song comes on shuffle. I guess I'll have to ask Billy his thoughts at the time when we're ballin' at the club.

Currently listening : Gish By Smashing Pumpkins Release date: By 04 October, 1994

Lights, Camera, 5 Minutes of Action!

I went to my first movie audition yesterday evening. The whole experience was surreal. I warmed up at my house with stretches, vocal warm-ups, GTA San Andreas...then headed out.

I got there 10 minutes early and stayed in the car and went over my one and only monologue just in case they ask for one. The audition notice was for improvisers and they mentioned they would be providing a "side", which is a page of the script, 15 minutes prior to the audition itself. However, I wanted to be as prepared as possible just in case they got a wild hair and wanted a bit more.

The character in the script was a lot like the role description they had given me, so, I felt good about that. I got into the character pretty quickly and tried the lines out to a wall in the back complete with gestures, coughs, and little ad-libs to make the character believable and my own.

I was summoned into a room where they had set up a small stage with a chair, microphone hanging above it, a canopy with light semi-circumventing the area and a camera. I shook hands with the directors and producers of the film and they seemed like a jolly bunch. Whoah, this has the inklings of a professional deal! So, I took my chair and got into action!

5 minutes later, I was done reading through the lines the first time and staying on script in character and then a second time with me improvising the scene with a couple of cues from the script. I was a lot of fun! I then proceeded to reshake the same hands as before and walked out feeling pretty good about it. Callback or not, it was a good audition.

The speed at which this audition went made me wonder how many other people were trying out for this. Must be a lot because they wasted no time getting me in, seeing what I could do, and getting me out. It seems that the more and more I audition for things, the less time I get to actually showcase my talent. The good news is, thanks to my warm-ups and a bit of advice from various folks, I get down to bidnez right from the start. FUN!

Currently listening : Destroyer By Scabs Release date: By 29 August, 1994

Down With My Tracker

I bought my Geo Tracker new in 1997 with the idea that it would last me forever. I knew it was a complete chick magnet back in the day with it's meager 4 cyclinder engine, boxy construction, complete with it's rattles, shakes, and inability to handle uneven surfaces. It was a convertable that only lived a whopping two days in that form due to the logistics of storing and maintaining a hard top in a small apartment. It never left me stranded, however, and although what repairs were done on it were costly due to expensive parts, it was overall easy to maintain. I thank the Tracker for it's wonderful service in my life!

My transmission started slipping and acting a fool last week; the sure tell-tale signs that something was going on with my beloved transportation. So, I am keeping it on medical leave while I put the wheels in motion to find a replacement. I'm looking at getting a Nissan Murano as a replacement. I was hoping to get one at the end of the year, but, alas, it may come sooner than later.

So, any one want a Tracker in a slightly-used-for-10-years condition?

Currently listening : Code Red By DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince Release date: By 12 October, 1993

Embarrasing Moments in History

Moment #1
I was working for a "I Can't Believe It's Yogurt" shop in San Antonio and had just become self-sufficient enough to attend to customers. I was 16 and full of vigor and ignorance, but, was having a blast getting a paycheck every week to blow on everything I probably shouldn't. A customer walks in and orders a waffle cone with Chocolate and vanilla swirled. I craftily put together the delicious treat, wrap a napkin around the base, and hand it to the customer with a spoon left inside. They then ask me to remove the spoon. I pull the spoon out of their ice cream and proceed to lick it clean. Their face turns to complete disgust and they hastily pay for their ice cream and leave. I didn't see what the problems was. What, THEY were supposed to be licking that spoon clean?

Moment #2
I went to my first Ice-T concert shortly after I arrived to Chicago. I was a longtime fan and had brought all of my Ice-T cds with me in the hopes to get his autograph. I got right up front of the pit and maintained my proximity to the Iceberg and was mouthing all the words. The classic "Original Gangster" track came on and I went nuts. He then tells me to come up on stage! Holy shit! Ice-T asked me to come up on stage. I was beside myself not knowing what to do. I am moving and grooving and dancing and having a ball. I then decide to act out the song by acting I got shot. In the middle of the air, I accidentally kick Ice-T in the back of the head. I've never seen security move so quickly to jack me up! I was locked into a full Nelson (yes, the irony), slammed into shit back stage and released back into the crowd. After that, Ice-T would barely approach anyone in the crowd. I was embarrassed but it still makes me laugh.

Currently listening : O.G. Original Gangster By Ice-T Release date: By 14 May, 1991

Note: This was originally posted on MySpace with comments at:
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&FriendID=16074757&blogMonth=4&blogDay=21&blogYear=2006

Some News on Young M.C.

Bonjour mis amis!

As you may already know, I am a huge Young M.C. fan and have been hungry for YMC news beyond the Celebrity Fit Club stint he did. I found a recent podcast with him on it prior to doing a show out in Vancouver, BC, Canada. Enjoy!

Peace,
Nelson

Currently listening : Stone Cold Rhymin' By Young MC Release date: By 15 June, 1990

Is Blogging Your Life Too Informal?

I was wondering this today as I've been blogging the progress on the cleanse. I've noticed that as people ask me, "Hey, what's new?" then I end up telling them to go check out the blog or just give them the blog recap. Is this too informal?

I've seen some positives from a few friends. They hardly ever call as it is, but, are virtualy online 24-7. When we do actually talk, the ask me about the "goings ons" with the blog which provides a lot of place for elaboration. I feel connected to them even though we don't talk all that much.

The negatives are that people don't like having to read about my life but would rather hear it come from me. With my schedule and the schedules of others, we hardly have time to communicate. A lot of my friends don't even want to get into detail about what I would like to let them know about. So, how am I supposed to convey the news when we aren't around enough to talk or they don't really want to hear about it?

Luckily, I've already made up my mind on this. The blog is serving it's purpose. For those of you reading this, feel free to call me! I would love to chit-chat!

Peace,
Nelson

Currently listening : Blood Sugar Sex Magik By Red Hot Chili Peppers Release date: By 24 September, 1991

I'm a Hippie! I Conserve!

Hi everyone:

I am extremely happy to announce that I have been accepted into the Second City Training Center's Conservatory for Improvisation! I am so stoked because I feel that I am ready for it and look at it helping me in all kinds of wonderful ways!

I am going to treat this post as an acceptance speech so bear with me!

I'd like to thank:
- Me
- Jill
- Mom/Dad/Brother
- All the crazy actors in "Gone Blue"
- All the even crazier actors/directors/staff in Salsation Theatre Company
- All the wonderful staff at the Second City Training Center
- All my friends who supported and continue to support my quest to be successful at comedy.
- Sheryl Rak
- All the esses locked up in County

I would love to party next Saturday night with some folks after my Salsation show to celebrate this event. It's a delayed party because of my adversity to food at this moment, and if things go as I feel they will, I will be able to eat by then! LOL

Thanks again to everyone!

Peace,
Nelson

Currently listening : Celebration: The Best of Kool & the Gang (1979-87) By Kool & the Gang Release date: By 07 June, 1994

Note: This was originally posted on MySpace with comments at:
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&FriendID=16074757&blogMonth=4&blogDay=13&blogYear=2006

Master Cleanse Part Tres:Le Reckoning

The Master Cleanse is back for this quarter of the year! Whoo hoo!

Day 1
Unlike the last time I went on the cleansing journey, I decided this time to be a bit smarter about switching over. One of the most awesome benefits I kept from my previous cleanse was that I massively cut down on the amount of meat I was eating over all. I was religious about cutting chicken out of my diet and pretty good about pork (still have issues with eating pizza without some pepperoni and induldged in hot dogs when I shouldn't have). The amount of red meat I was eating also decreased while a lot of soy-based foods replaced them. I am sure my mother thinks I've lost my mind by changing my diet, but it's for the better, Ma!

I experienced all of the normal things I experience typically on day 2 (fatigue, headaches, hunger) on day 1. I felt a lot better after a 2 hour nap. I made my run to Trader Joes for my Grade B maple syrup and bought out the local supermercado of lemons. These lemons were like 200% bigger than normal. I think I got the lemons that got bovine injections for growth! I also swung by Jewel-Osco to pick up my standard issue bottle of Ice Mountain water to keep the hydration going.

More to come.

	Nelson V	Day 2 Day 2 was weird. I didn't have the annoying aches and chills I had last time (because I had them on Day 1) but I went on an emotional rollercoaster. I had fits of anger, depression, elation, and apathy throughout the day. I was actually able to concentrate the entire day, so that was cool. My sleeping has improved big time. Wihtout having all kinds of things running through my body, I actually fall asleep much faster and dream more vividly. When I wake up in the morning I don't have that "dread for life" outlook for the rest of the day. I wake up and it's "Hmmmm, what am I going to do with all the freed up time I'm not planning to cook, cooking, or thinking about food?" Last night I hit the studio and worked on a new song and actually finished enough of it to write lyrics to it. It's tentatively called "Rap Jam" cuz I don't have a real title for it. It combines some hippity-hoppity, reggae, fonk (yes, that's "fonk), and folk (kinda). As usual, I'll find a way to mix it up to sound different that the other stuff I write yet remain in the same vein. I was excited since I spent 4-6 hours yesterday and actually got something done! I originally went in to overdub some ovcals on preexisting tracks but my voice was very, very tight. I did't feel like dealing with it. It normally ges that way when I am stressed out or emotional of which I was both due to the cleanse. So, why push it? Time for my morning salt-water bath. Hmmm...salw-water.... Posted by Nelson V on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 at 8:22 AM

	Nelson V	Day 3 As usual, I seemed to have levelled off on my erratic emotions, thoughts, and cravings yesterday. I chose to skip the salt-water bathe yesterday due to lack of proper measuring tools for everything, i.e., the dishwasher hadn't been run and wouldn't be done prior to me drinking my first lemonade. It looks like Day 5 is the first day for it because I have to work today and can't very well be in a car stuck in traffic when the urge to splurge hits. I was feeling pretty good when I woke up. Even my posture had improved form the day prior since I was detoxifying myself and releasing those stress-related knots in my neck, chest, and back. I went on a long walk with Lola Rose and had plenty of energy to get to the park, walk around the park, and then head back. So, overall, Day 3 went pretty well. On a side note, there was a "My Wife and Kids" episode on yesterday way one of the kids' boyfriend was a vegetarian and was fasting for at least 9 days to assist his journey in reaching Gawd. They showed the kid passing out 3-4 times on the episode from the lack of solid food. It did make me laugh (kids passing out cold is funny!) but also showed how ignorant people can be about it. I told Jill, "I guess that's me, huh?" She laughed and said, "Yeah. You better be careful". As my vocal teacher had shown me, I chose this time around to quit calling the cleanse a "fast" because in a fast one does not allow food to pass their lips. I, on the other hand, am letting tiny bits of lemon enter my body, thus, technically, it's food. Plus, it was just a way to brag and boast to suit my ego I got a black 60 Gb iPod Video yesterday. Yes, I've joined the late 1990s! I have been doing A/B tests between AACs and WAV files of songs that I know inside and out. I am looking for the usual degredation I hear in the recordings (typically found in the high end). I listened to a WAV vs. a 128 Kbps AAC and honestly, could not hear a difference! This technology has been improved much more than I ever though. An mp3 at 128 kbps sounds like crap. The AAC(mp4) sounds just as good as a wav. So, I am going to give it a little bit more time before I completely decide which format my music resides in on the iPod. Posted by Nelson V on Thursday, April 13, 2006 at 8:41 AM

	Nelson V	Day 4 Gotta love MySpace when you post a comment and, well, it doesn't actually post up! This is time number two for me rewriting this accountof yesterday. All of the talk about fasting the day prior must've influenced this day. I woke up in the morning and got my usual mind-numbing conference calls. I had to take Jill to the airport to pick up a rental van for work around 10 AM. So, at 9, I jump in the shower and ge ready. Jill is ready by 9:45 AM and we leave. Since we usually prepare for these kinds of events at the last minute, in my haste to get out I left all of my lemonade-making supplies (read that "sustainance") at home! DOH! So, I basically lived off water for most of the day. I felt ok at work just drinking water. No headaches or dizziness (although my libido was through the roof...giggity......alright...j/k) occured and I was able to concentrate the entire day. Since I had nothing to do with food, I was way more efficient! I allow food to drive me instead of me driving to food (unless it's for a value meal or somethin'...). So, I need to be more cogniscent of my intention on eating. I know I eat when I am bored, stressed, or depressed. I also love to eat when I a celebrating something. What can I say, I love to eat! Anyway, I got a short reprieve by coming home to take Lola outside prior to me heading off to rehearsal. That lemonade was welcomed but not necessarily "hitting the spot" in my head. I then grabbed my already-prepared bag of goodies then headed off to practice. Rehearsal with Juan went well. He's Esteban's understudy at this point and will be playing E-Man's roles for the last two weeks of the show. He's really funny and I look forward to seeing audience reaction to his sketch parts and his improv. If you haven't cuaght the show already (or even if you have), SHAME ON YOU! Get tickets/reservations at http://www.salsation.com! LOL. Then I came home after rehearsal and had my last lemonade for the day. That was fun! Let's see what Day 5 has to offer because it's typically a turning point for me. I decided around this time how long I feel I need to go. The scale is typically "No days longer, a few days longer, or as long as I bloody can!" More to come, yo! Posted by Nelson V on Friday, April 14, 2006 at 9:43 AM

	Nelson V	Day 5 -7 This weekend was pretty cool. TFM was in full effect with great crowds and excellent improv sets afterwards. A big THANKS to everyone who came out to support me. Just a few less people on my weekly email reminder to list I got to clean my house (finally) and make it a place where I feel comfortable inside althought Lola seems to be of some other persuasion since she's shedding more hair than Ron Jeremy and leaving it everywhere. I also go to hang out with my extended family for Easter. We watched the Sopranos while we got our "Gawd on". Overall, a great weekend. Regarding the cleanse, it was rather uneventful Nothing of excitement occured. I guess the only real importance is how much stronger my voice has become because of my heightened awareness of my body. My vocal teacher is 100% correct when she stresses my head position with my voice. I can now sing without tilting my headback, however, the scalene muscles are still tight and attempt to pull it back. I can feel them strain when I lay my tongue flat in my mouth (or as flat as possible) trying to pull my head and tongue up. I am allowing my head to stay down and even kilter and keeping tabs on it. My favorite song for this check is "I-E-A-E-I-O" by System of a Down. It's all vowels in the chorus, therefore, no head movements should be occuring. More to come, I'm sure! Posted by Nelson V on Monday, April 17, 2006 at 7:26 AM

	Nelson V	Day 8 My day was good. I stayed at home all day while utilizing my work-from-home priviledges, and enjoyed my day. My senses were in peak form with a bit of my clairavoyance making guest appearances throughout the day (more on that later). In my usual masochistic nature, I flipped on the TV and began watching the food channel. I learned how Krunch Potato Chips and Cheetos were made on "UnWrapped!" hosted by that crazy OCD-having former Double Dare host Mark Summers. Talk about major munchies, bro! I was ready to throw Lola up on the grill and bust out the K.C. Masterpiece chips and have a feast! After that show, I watched a bit of Emeril. It's always during a cleanse I watch the Food Network. Last time I did the cleanse I allowed myself to salivate over the thought of eating NY and Chicago-style pizzas. When I got off the cleanse, that was my first real meal. I hadn't had Chicago-style pizza in eons and remembered quickly why ;-) It went out almost as quickly as it came in. Think I'll stick with thin-azz pizza form now on! I also watched "SuperSize Me!" on the Sundance Channel for the 5th-6th time. I was even more grateful to be on the cleanse while watching people engorge themselves on fast-food and seeing the effects it has on everyone. I am much more sensitive to the affects of food(or lack thereof) as a result of these cleanses. I promote the cleanse even more now to show people how much food affects me and, hopefully, by example, give them an impetus to review what they're doing to their own bodies by eating crap that isn't good for them (just read this blog and see what happens when you throw down with food that isn't any good for you!). The most memorable part of that movie for me is when they do the experiment of having multiple fast-foods vs. home-made versions of the same foods. The fries from fast-food do not biodegrade! When I thought about it, I was like, "I remember looking in a dumpster that had fries in the bottom of it. Two weeks later, those fries were still there in pristine condition! What the hell is it doing to my body?!" I've pretty much have sworn off fast-food fries from my diet. I may be in the market to find a fry maker of some sort. Overall weight loss has been 8 lbs. so far. The weight loss so far has been a lot more gradual than last time, which is fine by me. I can't wait to get darker and take some pictures :) Posted by Nelson V on Tuesday, April 18, 2006 at 12:04 PM

	Nelson V	Day 9 Nothing major on Day 9. I am just happy to be continuing this and seeing it through. I checked my tongue to see if the film residue of maple syrup was still present. Its clearing up but won't be clear by the end of Day 10. Oh well, it's clearer than times before so I know I am getting rid of toxins. I lost an additional 2.5 lbs and almost hitting a target weight goal for myself! Got some gurggling going on in my intestines with all the water and lemons scrubbing it clean for me. I watched the Food Channel again last night and kept seeing ads for the Domino's Pizza XLP (extra large pizza). It was loaded with pepperoni on it (yum!) and looked quite enticing! I must've seen 7 of those ads in an hour. It reminded me of the fact that food companies spend millions of dollars on advertising. The TV airwaves are gluttoned with adverts from all these corporations, thus, making it difficult for the average person to escape the jaws of the fast-food industry. I will make an effort to avoid fast-food as much as possible. When it comes to pizza, that's the only kind I love. I used to be into Chicago-area pizzerias but I enjoy the chain stuff even more since it was stuff I greup on. Moderation is the key I suppose. Well, enough about food. One more day then I get orange juice! Whoo hoo! Posted by Nelson V on Wednesday, April 19, 2006 at 9:16 AM

Nelson V

Day 10 Whoo hoo! My last day on the cleanse! It was all definitely worth it. I lost another 3 lbs. since the previous day and my energy level had gone up. I must admit I really missed the activities of chewing my food, so, I bought packs fo gum to chew on to alieviate that sensation. I had bought a dozen lemons on Day 9 and was down to 6 on Day 10. Not bad! I was watching CNN Headline News throughout the day and saw this special they did on pro-ana and pro-mia sites (eating disorders) where girls get together and discuss their eating disorders in detail. I decided to visit one of them and it broke my heart to read these posts. With me being a tech guy, I read a alot of posts that I believe are just complete garbage thinking, "C'mon, no one would post something up like that." Then I would visit some of the blogs these girls would put up and some of them go all the way back to 2003! When you read me blog, it sounds like I'm anorexic myself at times. I got to thinking about the demographics and culture of girls with eating disorders. Stereotypically, I hear about white, middle-class teenage girls going through bouts of them. In fact, I dated a girl who essentially was an anorexic (she outgrew it I believe). A majority of them mask their sense of loss of control by controlling one of the few things they can that have a direct impact on their friends - their weight. Of course, validation of oneself from within is a lost art in our country, thus, it's understandable how these girls can look for outward approval for their inside acceptance. The problem is, they have already set their mind that they are ugly, unworthy of love, or too fat, therefore, no outside praise on their looks will be good enough. I completely and utterly understand that feeling because I am on the road to self-validation after a long time of looking for outside acceptance. Instead of controlling my weight, I chose to try to control other people. Essentially, no matter what happened that was good, I wasn't truly happy. Also, our society doesn't help either by plastering uncommon body-types all over magazines and TV and marketing to those same people that are most susceptable to becoming victim to the hype. I partially fault "society" but I put a lot of it on the the parents and kids since these kids need to be reminded that they have, arem and always will be beautiful, intelligent, and worthy of love. As long as they remember that, they will easily shrug off these ideals of normalcy that they get coerced into believing. I went out and bought all the stuff for my vegetable soup. I totally look forward to it. Some good habits I think I've picked up from this cleanse so far: - Eating more slowly and thoroughly. - Thinking and feeling when I am hungy and not eat just because "it's time" - Stretching my muscles more. I have a lot more awareness of them. The jury is still out on pepperoni pizza. I want to give it up, so, I will always want to but never do it. My hearts not in it right now. I did, however, buy my own pizza making kit. I plan to buy soy mozzerella and soy pepperoni and try it out. Hopefully it can break me out of the "swine pie" I love so much! Posted by Nelson V on Thursday, April 20, 2006 at 10:29 AM

Note: This was originally posted on Myspace with comments at:
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&FriendID=16074757&blogMonth=4&blogDay=12&blogYear=2006

Expect the Totally Expected

I get the feeling that people have to once again be trained in how to be "online". I read this story and it made me shake my head. Everything somebody puts online about themselves is subject to critism, review, and action by everyone else!

What makes MySpace.com so beauitful makes it so dangerous. It combines all the online tools (blog, chat, messaging, audio, video, and social networking) into one place for each user which means as quickly as someone can get in touch with their friends and tell them how wasted they got the night before, one can be just as quickly dismissed from school for that same behavior.

Mommas, don't let your babys grow up to abuse MySpace...

Currently listening : Duro En La Pintura By Chingo Bling Release date: By 05 April, 2005

Social Retardation

I went to a club/bar last night with a couple of my friends. The music was bumpin', the chicks were hot, and the drinks were cheap. Yes, this was in Chicago, believe it or not. You see, I don't ever feel comfortable in these situations because I don't drink, nor smoke, nor have enough friends that like to go out to the club, dress up to attract other people, buy drinks that require a damn manual to come to life (think of the Fuzzy Sex on the Beach With Innie/Outtie Navel drink...what most girls are hitting on the Girls Gone Wild Videos), and then dance to 4-on-the-floor German dance music with guy that overdubs something like "Jesus...wheel barrow ... jack-o-lantern...mahi-mahi" in a monotone voice every once in a while. So, I show up at the club, buy myself a manly beverage - Sprite with "Lime-ez" - and go chill with my friends on the back of the club.

At this point I remind myself of just how socially inept I feel at the club. I like to people watch so, I am making eye contact with just about everyone there. I always wonder if I look like the crazy guy "who lives in a van down by the river"(Farley). I get self-conscious at this point and begin to wiggle and shake my booty to offset this feeling. So, as I am wiggling and shaking, another though enters my head: "Am I really trying to dance or look like a whale in heat that got stuck on the beach trying to get back into the water?" OK, I'm getting self-conscious again. At this time, I decide to go back to the bar and get another Sprite with Lime-ez.

As I wade through the sea of beautiful people, I am being courteous by saying, "Excuse me...pardon me...comin' through!" and gently guiding people out of my path. I notice at this point that guys give me their best Jackie Chan fighting glances and the ladies give me the "Oh, I'm sorry" looks as they step aside. On the side of the spectrum I see that pretty girls don't even have to ask for people to move. Guys trip over each other trying to get out of their way while the other girls moving are giving them the "That b*tch thinks she's better than me" look.

I make it to the bar and pull up along side a girl ordering her drink. I caught her looking at me through the corner of her eye then quickly turning away to pretend she was watch ESPN's coverage of the White Sox game. I smiled and chuckled since I found it funny that I've been pulled into her one-sided game of courtship. The bartender came over, got her order first, then got mine. After receiving our drinks, she turns 360 degrees in the opposite direction to "find her friend" and ends up facing the TV again. Then, she picks up her drink and walks away. I always though guys did stupid stuff like that, but, no, girls do it too. What happened to the good ole days of "Hi, I am __________. I decided to come get a drink next you so I could actually talk to you over the blaring music, the 500 conversations going on at once, and the occasional dance you break into with your circle of friends when the dj spins Jesse's Girl"?

So I head back to my friends and dance with one of them. She didn't seem to mind and giggled whenever I did something really wacky in my dances. I ended up freestyling about what was going on in the club and drank my drink with 5 tons of ice that cost me $3 (lime-ezez are expensive at this time of the year, so, I completely understand!). Shortly thereafter, I ended up going home.

So, the point of this story is to say that socializing skills need some work. I met a lot of people there but was to wrapped up in my own drama to get to know them while the whole high school clique thing was in full effect (as it is in most clubs). I wondered, "How old are we? Have we not yet transcended the social taboos of meeting people for the sake of having new interactions with our fellow (wo)man?" Alas, the answer is no for most of us.

Hi, my name is Nelson and I'm a social retard...can you please validate my parking?

Currently listening : A Crow Left of the Murder By Incubus Release date: By 03 February, 2004

How Do Changes Get Started? They're Started By The Changin' People and...

Well, slap me silly and call me a mongoose! I've blessed myself with some changes in my life I want share with all of you.

First of all, I've finally decided to become a man. Don't try to change my mind. I've made it up and am going through with the operation. It should take another 4-5 years for my hormones to finally get up to the right levels. I've been attracted to women all my life, and well, finally had to come out and let you all know. Thanks for understanding.

Secondly, I get to do more non-hands-on stuff at work. Yes, I do actually work - sometimes. So, now, I get to talk to even more people around the world while trading nuggets of comedy in the process. Hopefully, I get more cash in the process.

One more than secondly, I did my taxes yesterday and got a pretty damn good refund! I've been debating how I want to blow all the cash. So far, my list consists of:

- Wine
- Women
- Wear De La Under
- Wawa Walters
- Wishing Wells
- Wigh-Pods
- Wecording Equipment
- West Wuy

If any one has better ideas of where to place my money for my greedy needs, please let me know.

Lastly, I've got an audition tomorrow that will change my life for the better. My improv skills will reach new heights and will allow me to control minds a lot more easily (mostly my own mind).

Stay tuned and drop me some love when you can.

Peace,
The Magnificent Nelson V.

Currently listening : Stadium Arcadium By Red Hot Chili Peppers Release date: By 09 May, 2006

Time Of The Month? Or Just Plain Wackiness!?

I know that women and men are different in biological and social areas. I love being reminded of just how cracked up women seem to me every once in a while.

There's a girl that I get to see on a pretty regular basis, and sometimes she is completely cool, fun, energetic, and fun to be with. Other times she is a crabby, tired hag who tries to spread her dissatisfaction with anyone who is willing to be drawn into her drama. When I look into her big eyes, I can see what is going on her head. With the drastic changes in moods, I ask myself, "What the hell is going on with this chick?!"

Now I know that I, like a lot of people, would love to blame her for everything "wrong" with her. However, I know that I am responsible for how I feel about it. After all, I am the master of my domain! So, I recognize that a part of me wants to be accepted by her unconditionally, i.e., I am looking for some sort of validation of who I am by her. Another part of me wants to play amatuer psycologist and get in her head and fix everything that is wrong. As a wise person told me, "The Universe is a perfect mess. It's not for you to fix." With that said, I have acknowledged how I feel about the situation and have started looking at how I choose to feel about it (answer:achieve validation from myself and not others).

Since I always have the urge to share my feelings with others, I have a difficult time expressing the situation and all sides of it as well. I sometimes give the "She's crazy!" or "It's the time of the month" excuses. Even if they are being affected by the position of the moon, chemicals that hve been injected into bovines, or the occasional misfiring of neurons, I will be open to it all and allow my self perception to come from within.

Thank you my dear friend for giving me a mirror to see my own issues with.

Currently listening : Nerf Herder By Nerf Herder Release date: By 03 December, 1996

Note:This was originally posted on MySpace with comments at:
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&FriendID=16074757&blogMonth=4&blogDay=1&blogYear=2006