Sunday, January 11, 2009

Hello Kitty - Goodbye B*tch

When I first moved to Chicago in 1998, I came up here knowing absolutely nobody.  I figured I had enough social skills to make new friends and was determined to find me a suitable girlfriend as soon as possible.

This guy Mark who lived in my building was effectively my wingman on many occasions.  He and I would drive out to the 'burbs to pick up chicks at Woodfield Mall (looking back on, all I ever see there are high school chicks now.  I really hope I wasn't THAT CREEPY OLD GUY trying to pick them )  We decided to go to Olive Garden and grab some food.  While we were there, we were being waited on by a really attractive girl.  Feeling emboldened by having my wingman with me, I flirted with her to see if she was interested (of course she was!) and got enough indicators that asking her out would be okay.  So, after we finished paying our bill and getting up to leave, I went and found her and asked her out.  She gave up the digits and I was flying high on the Love Express! 

She and I talked for a few days off and on the phone and IM.  She seemed to be okay and still interested in going out.  I wanted to take her out to dinner so she gave up the addy to her parent's house.  I got there and was greeted by her mother and father both of whom were very nice and cordial.  I told them where I came from, where I worked, and what we had planned for the evening while she was getting ready.  She then beckoned me down to the basement where her room was. 

I walk down there and I see her on the computer IMing her huge list of friends.   She got up, gave me a hug, thanked me for coming over, and then resumed IMing her friends.  I took a seat across from her and literally watched her IM her friends for a good 20 minutes while we sat in virtual silence the entire time .  I then asked her if she wanted to go ahead and grab a bite to eat and she seemed a bit lukewarm to the idea but relented.  All those good vibes previously were all gone.  Since I had made the trip to the 'burbs, I was determined to see where this situation was going as I had taken a lot of time out my schedule and put some wear and tear on the Tracker .  That was a dumb move.  We ended up going walking around Woodfield Mall.  We walked together and she wouldn't stop talking about her IM friends the whole time.  I was thinking, "Damn it girl, I thought you were 20.  You speak as if you're 16!"  Severely annoyed, I couldn't wait for this stroll to end.  As we re getting ready to leave the mall to go to dinner, she spots a store and yells out "HELLO KITTY!  OH MY GAWD!  Can we PLEASE go there?!!!"  I glanced inside and saw a bunch of cheap looking girlie crap sitting inside.  I said "Sure" and we headed in. She "oohed" and "ahhed" just about everything in that store.  I knew at this point that this girl was absolutely nuts, thus, it wasn't going to work.  I ended up taking her home after she claimed she wasn't really all that hungry (I was starving but was thrilled at the idea of taking her home).

Talk about a case of  "She's just not that into you..."
Currently reading:
Hello Kitty Hello 2009! Wall Calendar: (with stickers)
By Abrams

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