Friday, November 25, 2011

Ready For Another One? I Think Not!

The Velazco Clan has grown by 2 in Chicago and 2 in Dallas, Tx/Bonaire, GA in the last 4 years.  Personally, I like having two and have always held a place in my heart for 3.  The question is: WHY?

I went to Hooters with my neighbor Jack and my son AKV to Hooters (yes, a family restaurant).  Our waitress was a very cute woman with a fun personality; her conversations seemed genuine and she seemed to be happy.  At some point in the service she started talking to AKV by asking him how old he was, if he was enjoying his chocolate milk and fries, and other fun questions.  My son is very shy around strangers (a la The Wifey) so I helped him answer the questions.  She then mentioned she had a son who was the same age he was.  That kicked off a conversation about children.  I come to find out she had 4 kids - it blew my frakin' mind!

Her body was in AWESOME shape for poppin' out 4 kids and she seemed to be pretty young.  They were all spaced 2 years apart.  Just the thought of having more than 2 made me sick to my stomach; all of the running around after them; having to dealing with raging hormones on both sides of the gender war; realizing the further erosion of our self-image, free time, and finances; all of these thoughts hit me at once when she mentioned she had four and was hoping for 1 more.  I wanted to ask her if she had a vajayjay or was starting her own damn refugee camp!

I asked her about her "man" and she seemed to allude she was married (I finally saw the ring on her finger) and she didn't seem to make a big deal about him contributing to the Partridge Family tribute act she was raising.  She then told us about her "need for speed" - she apparently races cars semi-professionally.  I'm no NASCAR expert but I do know that racing is a HUGE investment of time and money even at the hobby level.  She told us she had a sponsors and spent roughly $10-$15K a year on keeping her car in contention.  I then started redoing all of my math again - 4 kids, race car, wants a 5th kid, she works at Hooters.  Either she's an awesome racer, her man makes a ton of money, she has another side job, or her kids incur no expenses.  No way she could sustain that lifestyle


No way I could sustain that lifestyle :)

I didn't have the gall to pry anymore into her personal life as I felt weird talking to a scantily clad server already and had the fear of become that "creepy customer" so I let it go.  This experience helped me decide that I'm not ready for #3 just yet.

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